Blindfolded

I'm sad to say that I've been known to hold a few stereotypes over the heads of others. As much as I despise that I have done this in the past, it's just one more crummy quality that I share with society. Some stereotypes that we continue to keep strong were started years ago and in most cases, I have no idea why. For my own personal demons, it's my past experiences that have kept me blindfolded, letting certain stereotypes stay in the forefront of my mind.

For those of you that know me, you know that I am bi-racial. My mother is white and my father is black. They had a very tumultuous relationship and my father was not the best of husbands. I held onto a lot of hurt following my parents divorce and throughout the years, I have had a difficult time re-connecting with my father's side of the family. Also, it didn't help that I grew up in a very tiny town, where variety wasn't the spice of life. We were one of the only families that were of another ethnicity. I didn't have the opportunity to grow up around my family's Caribbean culture and find that even now I am struggling to fit in.

It's been hard for me to let go of some of my poor opinions of my father. I love my father but he has never been a trustworthy man in my eyes. I find that I've been wearing a heavy coat of armour because of that. I've always had a difficult time trusting and respecting a man that resembles my father at all. I realize that I've categorized black men in general. Did I think it would be easier to stay blindfolded all my life? To ignore any man that fell into that category? Have I been selling everyone short?

In some cases, I think it was easier for me to ignore. To the gents out there that kiss your teeth; I don't feel that that's a proper greeting. For those of you that think your jeans should sit at your knees; I think you look ridiculous. These things just don't float my boat and have added fuel to the fire. I don't think that will ever change.

But, it turns out that I let my guard down and someone slipped through a crack in my armour. This Jouster made me open my eyes just a little wider. Wide enough for me to realize how closed off I had been. Wide enough for me to realize that I can't judge a book by it's cover. Thank you Jouster. Not just for the nice dinner but for the long deserved kick to my ass. I hope you continue to prove me wrong.

Until next time

What ever happened to You Know Who?

Just last week my girlfriends and I went out and happened to run into one of my friends old flames. We were in shock. Not from the awkward conversation but by his transformation. The once super cute guy had lost his fit body, shaved his head and grew a handle bar mustache. Needless to say, he was a little underwhelming for us. Seeing him channel a tinier version of Hulk Hogan got me thinking about my own exes. What ever happened to them?

So, I had to search and in some cases thank goodness for social media. My serious past partners were easier to find; married with children, long term girlfriend with children, long term girlfriend, and still not ready for commitment. Somehow my earlier partners had all settled down and were making mini versions of themselves. Over the years, my partners apparently became a little unstable, insecure and just plain wacky :S Unfortunately, it turns out that I can put most of my relationships in the latter categories!

What if I had been the girl who had always dreamed of the perfect husband and 2.5 children? Would I still be living in a small town? Would I have settled down by now, driving a mini van and picking out a collie dog? Would I be happy?

Well, if I had, I would have missed one hell of a good run! I have no regrets, just learning experiences. My experiences have helped me grow and they continue to make me stronger. I'm confident in myself and I will just have to wait it out until I can find someone that channels my own Mr. Right.

Till next time

Hiatus

Welcome back to Me! It turns out I've been on a hiatus. Not somewhere getting zen with nature or a hiatus from being single. Just a hiatus from my blog. The big year I had envisioned for myself has had its ups and downs. I've decided to get back on track. Call it Fall Cleaning if you will! I'm going to tackle my blog and everything else on my to do list.

No more pushing and pulling myself to fit the needs of others. Nope. This is my time. For my goals and dreams. My own adventures. It's time to get a little selfish and be a lot of Single in the City!

~~For all of my past, present and future gents:

If you feel that you bear any resemblance to the guys in my blog, it's because you do! Thanks for sparking my interest and my creativity.~~

Till next time